The Handmaid's Tale

I finished it. "The Handmaid's Tale." It was....weird. I hated it. But, at the same time, I really liked it and could not put it down.

What's it about? I'm not entirely sure...some futuristic throwback to Biblical times? A Holocaustic commentary on religion?

Mayday mayday!

Check it out. Or don't.

Mrs. Stewart- Tell Mr. Stewart he gets once and then he must address me properly, so he better choose wisely.

Completed: One Book

Just finished Dan Brown's "Angels and Demons." My thoughts? I found the beginning a little slow, but the action picked up in the middle and the book had a nice solid ending. I approve. On my random rating scale that means absolutely nothing I give this book a 7.78.

I'm down to oohhh, 35 books left on my bookshelf in the "to be read" stacks. Yes, stacks, plural. I think for every one I finish I add two more! But at least I've always got a selection. Next I will be taking advantage of my fabulous Nook's "LendMe" feature and will be delving into the electronic pages of "The Handmaid's Tale." We shall see if my goal of completing the book in the 14 days allotted by Nook will be met with success...Looks like I've gotta get my read on now!

Inner Calm

So I've been reading this book ("The Seeking Heart" by Fenelon) at the recommendation of a colleague as a daily devotional. I've found it good, but nothing really jumped out at me. Until today...

Inner Calm

I hear you are having problems sleeping. You must wait for sleep in peace. If you let your imagination run away with you when you are trying to sleep, you may never get to sleep. I will not think that you are growing spiritually until I see that you have become calm enough to sleep peacefully without restlessness.

Ask God for calmness and inner rest. I know what you are thinking- that controlling your imagination does not depend on yourself. Excuse me, please, but it depends very much on yourself! When you cut off all the restless and unprofitable thoughts that you can control, you will greatly reduce all those thoughts which are involuntary. God will guard your imagination if you do your part in not encouraging your wayward thoughts.

Live in peace. Your imagination is too active; it will eat you up! Your inward life will die of starvation. All that buzzing in your mind is like bees in a beehive. If you excite your thoughts, they will grow angry and sting you! How can you expect God to speak in His gentle and inward voice when you make so much noise? Be quiet and you will hear God speak. Live in the peace of Jesus.

Hmm. Someone was paying attention to my restless nights...

Play with your food

I know, I know. I've been neglecting my duties as a blogger. Maybe I'm not cut out for this line of work....

I'm always on the lookout for amusing articles, funny pictures, and examples of creative ways to deal with the stressors of everyday life. This one made me smile: Play with your food . And thanks to one of my sisters-in-law, I can create some of my own stress relief food with my Ms. Food Face plate!

Top 'o the morning to you

May those that love us, love us.
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts,
May He turn their ankles
So we will know them by their limping.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/the-scoop-on-st-patrick-2465481/

The semi-lucid morning of a recovering insomniac

My eyes felt like sandpaper when I rolled over to look at the clock this morning. 2 minutes till. I don't think my groan was actually audible, but I can't be sure.

No sense waiting for the alarm. I'm guessing the cats are waiting outside the bedroom door for me, but I can't see them in the darkness. Guess I missed changing the time on the light timer. Fumble for the light switch- I'd rather not trip over a cat on the stairs in the dark. Ouch! My toes are not food. Why do you insist on nibbling on them every morning? Give me 30 more seconds and you'll have your food. Ugh. There's the "I didn't get enough sleep last night" feeling- I bet it rivals an expectant mother's morning sickness (though having never been an expectant mother, I cannot say this with absolute certainty). Thankfully I know it's short-lived and will have disappeared within half an hour. No, you cannot be in the bathroom with me while I shower. Why? Because the last time I let you in, you meowed the entire time; you sounded like the water was some flesh-eating acid and you were watching me melt down the drain.

I need socks. Sigh, they're downstairs since the clean laundry hasn't made it all the way back upstairs where it belongs. Well, I'll clean out the litterbox and take down the trash and I can grab my socks then. Oh, I should clean out the basement litterbox too. Geez! This trash is heavy. No! You don't need to go in the garage, I'm just putting the trash out there so it can go out.

Ok, so I don't have time to dry my hair now- I really should clean out the litterboxes the night before trash day...Ouch! Quit pouncing on my feet! Darn it! I forgot my socks.

Hmm, what to pack for lunch? Ok- a little of this and a little of that, done. Ready to go. Wait! Didn't check the weather.....now ready to go. Oh, my water. Now ready to go. Really. *Yawn*

I'll be the first to admit that my sleepless nights are less frequent than in the past. But atypical events still throw my system out of whack- things like the time change, or staying up waaaay too late, or caffeine (mmm, caffeine...). And for several days I'll be "off" with my thoughts jumping around like I have ADHD and my body working in slow motion as if I was stuck in molasses. Some people are under the impression that since I don't sleep well, I don't need sleep. I'd like to correct that- that's someone who's having a manic episode- which I hear can be fun. No, I'm more of an insomniac, meaning I really would like to be able to sleep. A bad night is when I've been laying in bed for 2 hours and sleep just won't come, but I'm so tired I can't see straight. That leads to the incoherent ramblings of the sleep deprived. The bright spot is, unlike a true insomniac, that if last night was bad, tonight I'll sleep.

Progress

Slow progress, but progress nonetheless. Plus an interesting fact about my heart.

Created by MyFitnessPal - Free Calorie Counter

Will beat 108,806 times, pump 1,596 gallons of blood, and push that blood nearly 9,884 miles throughout my body!

Created by MyFitnessPal.com

When I Grow Up

With only a year to go until I turn 30, I sometimes contemplate that it may be time to let go of my Peter Pan attitude and start acting like a grown up. But then I think about how dull my Facebook pictures would be and I push those silly thoughts aside. Let's face it, if I managed to get a bachelor's degree, a master's degree, a professional counseling license, and get married and none of those things deterred me from wearing my hair in pigtails and trying on every crazy hat I see, I don't think anything will!

It's not that I have an aversion to adulthood, I just don't feel all grown up yet (and I think part of my hopes I never do!). It's good clean fun playing with Bacon B'acon and digging out my coloring books. Yeah, yeah, I'm trying to get all settled in this intense grown up job I have- all the more reason to unleash my inner child when I go home. Sloshing your way through people's mental muck is exhausting, draining, heartbreaking at times (and rewarding, fulfilling, incredible, and did I mention exhausting?). Is it any wonder I sometimes take mental vacations (and wish they were real vacations) or dream about things I like to do in my free time (if I ever have any) like:

1. Turn my amateur bakery into a professional one- oh, but first take a cake decorating class or two

2. Be an author- I do have a book of poetry and a book of autism anecdotes already written. And a novella started...

3. Do research- I used to say frequently "I should do a study on that."

4. Be a photographer- travelling far and wide to take pictures of beaches and mountains and such.

5. Be a beach bum- this is my favorite one to imagine. The smell of salty water, the breeze in my nappy dried ocean-water hair, sun on my skin (which in my fantasy is always golden tan and never the pasty white or sunburn red of reality), ice cold lemonade next to my stack of novels, the sounds of a steel drum band drifting over the waves...

My new home

I'm sure this is true for others, but nothing is ever easy in my life. I typically count on having to do things at least twice before it's right. Like when my husband and I went to buy a new tv- we actually bought four (yes, FOUR) before we got one that worked properly. New dining room table- two. Even our first apartment needed replaced (but two years of drama at Brooksedge is another blog). The pattern holds for our house hunting saga. But I found this little gem while keeping my eyes on real estate in the area. I think we've definitely found a winner here!

http://www.camtaylor.com/homes/OH/Columbus/43211/1070_East_15th_Ave/2051268613/index.html

Not really. And that's not the worst of the pictures I've seen. Our active house-hunting should resume (pending any other strokes of misfortune) in the future (not necessarily the near future, but the foreseeable future. Perhaps round 2, when it begins, will be more promising.

And hopefully, the Morris luck does not apply to other members of the family (yes, Sister, I did see your news. Congrats and good luck!)

myfitnesspal

Tug. Tug. Suck. Grumble. Squeeze. Zip. Sigh.

Sound familiar? It's the morning battle- struggling to fit into my clothes. I know I'm not the only one. I keep bargaining with myself- "I'll start fresh tomorrow...on Monday...when it gets nice outside." "I'll trade my calories for 2 snacks for this one cupcake." "I slept in today, so I can have a large brunch since I didn't have breakfast."

Enough is enough. Either I just give in and go buy the next size up or I get off my duff and do something about it. Hmm, sounds familiar- like something my husband might have said after a rant. (Not the get off your duff part, he was much too nice for that.) Since I refuse to give up the wardrobe of clothes I actually like (for once) I guess I better get myself in gear. And I did just read this book on running that was pretty motivational... And a couple of family members are having some great success. Procrastinating is fine when it comes to doing my homework, but not when it comes to how I feel about my body (yes, I am sometimes in the 80% of women who are dissatisfied with their bodies). It's time to stop blaming my job (all I do is sit there for 8-10 hours a day). It's time to put down the chocolate (*gasp* maybe not!). It's time to NOT bake cupcakes unless I have someone to give them ALL to so the leftovers aren't hanging around waiting to be eaten so they don't go to waste.

Yes, I have more reasons than just fitting into my clothes. I KNOW I feel better a few pounds lighter. I KNOW my cholesterol is lower when I'm not carrying around extra weight. I'm SURE it'll be better for my bum knee if it's not working harder than it needs to to support the rest of me. I HEAR you actually have more energy when you workout, but I can't remember. I HOPE maybe I'll sleep better too.

For those of you who care about such things:

• No, I'm not on a diet.
• Yes, I am watching what I eat- and more importantly, how much of it I eat.
• Yes, I might possibly be a little bit crazy dragging myself out of bed an hour before I HAVE to be up so that I can get my workout done and out of the way.
• Yes, I am having a hard time with it, but I'm only 3 days into my new resolved plan with better a better support system in place than on my last attempt and I hope it gets easier.
• No, I'm not really giving up chocolate, but please don't tempt me with it. I already know Easter candy is hitting the stores and Easter does have the best candy. Mmmm....peeps....
• Yes, I am on a mission to find a Shamrock Shake from McDonald's this year and I will do an extra workout (or 3) that week to make up for it.
• Yes, I am interested in finding a workout buddy (but good luck coordinating schedules with me, sigh!)
• Yes, I am testing out this cool food/exercise/weight tracking device at myfitnesspal.com. Ask me in a couple weeks how I like it.
• No, I'm not going to start eating meat (ok, that has nothing to do with this blog, but it is a question I get from time to time.
• Yes, checking in with my mama in the mornings when we've completed our workouts does seem to be helpful. Anyone else want in on the accountability program?
• Yes, I do have a specific goal in mind.
• No, I am not telling you. It's none of your business.
• No, I don't want you to tell me that I don't need to lose weight or that I'm fine the way I am or that you'd love to be the size I am. So. Not. Helpful. I'm not trying to be a size 00 or even a size 0. Just more comfortable in the size of clothes I already own. So if you can't say something supportive don't say anything at all.
• No, I don't feel the need to justify what I'm doing, but if I put it out there maybe it'll motivate me to actually do what I've told- well- the world (or the 2 people who read my blog) what I'm doing.
• Yes, I know it will actually take a few months to reach my goal. Maybe by then the healthier eating habits will have become just that- habits.
• Yes, I know myfitnesspal weight loss tracker shows I've lost 0 pounds. But it's got a cute little frog that'll hop along as I make progress!
• Yes, this list is longer than I intended. *Shuffles off to find some carrots*

Created by MyFitnessPal - Free Weight Loss Tools